Kris Vallotton • May 8, 2020

Answers to Your Top 3 Questions About Spiritual Fathers & Mothers.

PROMISE OF RESTORATION

One of the gravest sins found around the globe today is the chill of frozen hearts that are resident in spiritual fathers and mothers who no longer disciple , resulting in disconnected Believers who are desperate for authentic affection and deserving devotion. It’s a concern of mine because I can contribute a big part of experiencing personal revival in my own life to the spiritual mothers and fathers that have poured into me. Yet, there is hope to be discovered because there remains a promise from long ago that I’ve repeated many times to many congregations across the globe— Malachi 4:5-6:

Behold, I am going to send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and terrible day of the Lord. He will restore the hearts of the fathers to their children and the hearts of the children to their fathers so that I will not come and smite the land with a curse

Over 2,500 years ago, God revealed to Malachi the significant value that He places on the restoration of relationships and the importance of covenant relationship. We are in a Kairos season ; God is on the move. He is sovereignly stepping in, and I prophesy that this sovereign moment will be marked by a revival of reconciliation not only in natural families but significantly in spiritual families as well.

THE TOP 3 MOST ASKED QUESTIONS

The God-ordained relationships that the enemy has worked hard at dismantling in the dark, God is swiftly swooping in and declaring for His people to “Arise and shine…” (Isaiah 60). I believe God’s justice is currently being served, and it is being demonstrated through the supernatural rekindling of His unfathomable love found in relationships grown cold. This move of God will catalyze personal revival and deepen the reality that we are, in fact, sons and daughters of God made manifest in the earth. This personal reconnection of hearts between sons and daughters and mothers and fathers will lead to a new great global awakening of God’s love. Thus, I feel it is encumbered upon me to address the most often asked questions about spiritual parents, covenant relationships, and how to prepare your heart for such a relationship.

Should everyone have a spiritual father or spiritual mother?

In short, yes. It’s not so much a matter of should, rather a matter of fact that everyone deserves to have someone spiritually investing in their life. 2 Corinthians 5:11-21 states that God has given us the ministry of reconciliation. In other words, we are biblically mandated to serve others through the demonstration of a relationship that intentionally practices reconciliation.

Many believers are crying out to God to see His favor manifested in their lives. They want to walk in signs and wonders the way Jesus did and desire to see their destiny fulfilled. These are noble aspirations. Yet, there is no Godly favor that’s more excellent, no mightier of a miracle or destiny more divine than one encountering God’s unconditional love. I’m not merely speaking about a one-time run-in with God’s love (which is powerful and essential), I’m talking about the long-term, committed-without-conditions deep love that not only the world groans for but we all ache for and that can only be found through devoted and discipled relationships.
Should Believers have covenant relationships with their leaders like you have with Bill Johnson?

First, let me clarify what a covenant relationship is. The word covenant may sound like an archaic word that only cults or the staunchly religious use, but it’s purely a word to describe an inseparable bond formed through committed friendship. As Believers, we are in a new relationship (new covenant) with God which is mediated by Jesus (Hebrews 9:15). In John 15:15, Jesus said, “ No longer do I call you slaves, for the slave does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends , for all things that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you .” In that same chapter, vs 12, Jesus said, “ This is my commandment: Love each other in the same way I have loved you. There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. ”

Through the laying down of His life and demonstrated in His resurrection, Jesus exemplified that a covenant relationship is rooted in sonship and empowered by the devotion of true friendship. He’s invited us all into a relationship that is anchored around on-going, ever-increasing reconciliation. This is the gospel in a nutshell. It’s the love of a lifetime, the kind of love that ultimately casts out all fear, especially the fear of abandonment and rejection. The type of friendships that Jesus has with us and asks us to have with others was not meant to be a rare phenomenon, however it is because the Church has not embraced the true gospel of Jesus Christ.

To specifically answer the question: my relationship with Bill, which you can read more about here , is best described as a true friendship. It has nothing to do with him being a senior leader but everything to do with Bill himself. Devoted relationships aren’t about people’s position or title, rather it’s about the person. I would lay my life down for Bill, and I know he would do the same for me. Do you have a friendship like that? I believe we all long to have relationships in which people would die for us and us for them. In fact, I'm sure some of you already have genuine friendships as I have with Bill, but maybe you haven't given it the spiritual credit that it deserves or acknowledged the significance it's had in your life.

A word to the wise: A true friendship works both ways, it’s not one-sided and requires a lifetime of work and commitment. One example of a false friend is found in the relationship between Judas and Jesus. As you know, Judas betrayed Jesus with a kiss because he pursued intimacy without covenant (see Luke 22:47). He was in a relationship with Jesus for what he could get out of it. He sold what was left of his stock in Christ for 30 pieces of silver. What it comes down to is, Judas did not want to be in a relationship that cost him anything.
What do you do when you’ve been faithful to your local church but no spiritual father or mother has materialized in your life?

The challenge is, in a fatherless generation , there are a lot of Believers who act like orphans. It’s not necessarily their fault, rather a result of the deficit of love found in relationships today, but it feels nearly impossible to meet their many needs. It shouldn’t be that way. Not only do we need spiritual fathers and mothers to arise and shine in these dark days, but we need sons and daughters to not act like orphans! Here are a few things I would recommend to those who naturally desire a spiritual family:

Learn how to be a son or daughter. Spend time meditating on the truth that you are a child of God (1 John 3). Pray and ask the Holy Spirit to prepare and heal your heart so that you can embrace a healthy discipling relationship. Believe me, God desires to bring people into your life that will encourage you, challenge you, and spur you on!

Look for people in your daily life who model Christ . Though we are all in a spiritual family as we have been adopted into the family of God, there are some who are actively spiritual fathering and mothering. You’ll see it demonstrated in their lives through their relationships with one another. I encourage you to seek out these salt-of-the-earth individuals and give them access to your life. They may not be famous but they will be known by their love, wisdom, and devotion.

Lead by example. It’s our responsibility to be mothers and fathers to other people. Look at those who naturally seek wisdom from you and make time to disciple them. Encourage and invest in their God-given destiny, and be known for the love of God that you carry.

I believe God desires to bring healthy spiritual relationships into your life as it will fuel your own personal revival. I encourage you to recognize the value of the relationships that are right in front of you; I pray that as you grow these relationships,, God will meet you in a deeper and more meaningful way!

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Kathy's Mothers Day Message

By Kathy Vallotton • May 10, 2025

As Mother’s Day approached, I knew there was no one better to speak into the heart of motherhood than my wife, Kathy. Her life has been a living picture of grace, sacrifice, and Spirit-led strength. I believe her words will bless you the way her life has blessed me. Kris - Today, I want to honor the incredible women who wear the title of “Mother” with grace, strength, and unwavering love. A mother is a guiding light. She illuminates our paths with wisdom and warmth. She is the gentle hand that nurtures us in our earliest days, the fierce protector who stands by us through life’s storms, and the unwavering supporter of our dreams. Many times, Mom, our sacrifices go unnoticed. We juggle countless responsibilities, often putting our own needs aside to ensure the happiness and well-being of our family. That’s just what Moms do! My joy has always come from serving others. What some people call exhausting, I call invigorating! Even when my kids were young, I can't tell you how many sleepless nights I've had, comforting one of my babies because, ‘only Mommy will do.’ Love wins every time! But love has stolen my heart over and over again. In the good times and in the bad, Jesus has always been by my side, my solid rock and my firm foundation. He has been there beside you too! That big “S” that you wear on your chest didn't happen by accident. The bible says that He will never leave me or forsake me. During all of my laughter and through my many tears, He has always guided me in every situation. So when you feel weak, remember He is right by your side. When you don't think that you can move another muscle, He is your biggest cheerleader. When you get into a spot where life feels like more than you can handle, take a look at what the Lord says about you! You are Tenacious. Your perseverance is remarkable. As a Mom, you consistently push through obstacles with unwavering commitment to your goals. You are Courageous. Mom’s often take bold steps, stand up to what they think is just, even when faced with opposition or adversity. You can do this! You are Radiant. The love of Jesus shines brightly to all those who you come in contact with, inspiring positivity and hope. You are Unstoppable. Mom, once you set your sights on a goal, you exhibit an unwavering drive to help your children pursue their dreams and desires. You are Fierce. With a spirit that is unyielding, as a Mom, you will protect your family at all costs. You are Inspiring. Moms believe in their kids. We believe that all things are possible with God and encourage our families to go where no child has ever gone before! Mom, you are the architects of our character, teaching us values of kindness, empathy, and resilience. With every hug, every word of encouragement, you instill in us the confidence to pursue our passions and overcome obstacles. Your laughter brings joy to our lives, while your tears remind us of the depth of your love. As a mom myself, I celebrate not just the role you play but the remarkable individuals you are. You are the heart of the family, the keeper of traditions, and the source of unconditional love. Each moment shared, each lesson taught, and every story told weaves an unbreakable bond that shapes who we are. To all mothers, whether near or far, biological or chosen, your impact is profound and everlasting. Today, we celebrate you, not just for the love you give, but for the incredible people you are. Happy Mother’s Day! Kathy Vallotton

Character and Gifting: Favor with God and Favor with Man

By Kris Vallotton • March 5, 2025

Have you ever felt called to a spiritual role but struggled to find your place in it? Perhaps you've experienced a divine moment where God revealed a prophetic gift in your life, yet you found yourself wondering why others don't seem to recognize or acknowledge it. This tension between divine calling and human recognition can be one of the most challenging aspects of walking in prophetic ministry. I've spoken with countless individuals who believe God has called them to be prophets, yet they feel frustrated when church leadership doesn't immediately recognize their office. They often share powerful testimonies of divine encounters or prophetic words that confirmed their calling. But here's the beautiful truth I've discovered: authentic spiritual authority requires both divine appointment and human recognition. Scripture shows us that even Jesus "increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men" (Luke 2:52). This powerful verse reveals an important principle – spiritual authority flourishes at the intersection of Heaven's approval and earthly recognition. The Bible offers us profound wisdom about this journey of walking out our prophetic calling. Let's explore three essential principles that can help you navigate this path with grace and wisdom. 1. Understand the Process Between Anointing and Appointment King David's story provides one of the most powerful examples of the gap between divine calling and public recognition. When Samuel anointed David as king, the Spirit of the Lord came upon him powerfully – yet David didn't actually become king for fourteen years! During that time, he served faithfully, developed his character, and waited for God's timing. The journey between your prophetic calling and your public commissioning is not an accident – it's divine design. This season of preparation builds the character, wisdom, and spiritual maturity needed to carry the weight of prophetic authority. Just as David was anointed three times – once by God through Samuel and twice by the people – your prophetic gift may require multiple confirmations. Remember that if you have favor with God but not yet with leadership, pushing for recognition prematurely can lead to painful experiences. As Proverbs 18:16 reminds us, " A man's gift makes room for him, and brings him before great men. " Allow your gift to create the space for your ministry rather than trying to force open doors that aren't ready to receive you. 2. Avoid Self-Promotion and Political Maneuvering It’s important to realize that even though your gift is what gets you into the room, your character is the thing that keeps you there. There's a stark warning in Scripture about gaining influence through manipulation rather than divine timing. Absalom, David's son, shows us the danger of winning people's hearts through flattery, false promises, and undermining leadership. He created a following by positioning himself as more accessible and understanding than the established authority. In today's social media age, the temptation toward self-promotion has never been stronger. We can easily build platforms that elevate our image above our character. But true prophetic authority doesn't come through marketing yourself as an expert – it comes through humble service, consistent character, and divine timing. James 4:6 reminds us that " God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. " When we push for recognition prematurely or through manipulation, we may gain a position but miss the protection that comes with proper promotion. Like Joseph, who shared his prophetic dreams prematurely with his brothers, our lack of wisdom can create a much more difficult path to our destiny than God intended. 3. Embrace the Preparation Process The weight of the prophetic office is both invisible and substantial. I've witnessed many genuinely called individuals crumble under the pressure of premature promotion. The apostle Paul wisely instructed that leaders " should first be tested and then let them serve " (1 Timothy 3:10), and warned against laying hands on anyone hastily (1 Timothy 5:22). True preparation for prophetic ministry involves more than just having accurate prophetic words. It requires developing spiritual maturity, biblical understanding, relational wisdom, and emotional health. If you sense a prophetic calling on your life, embrace the preparation process with patience and humility. Serve faithfully where you are. Allow trusted leaders to speak into your life and development. Study the Scriptures diligently. And remember that the process between the promise and the palace is not just necessary – it's a gift that prepares you to succeed when your time comes. My prayer for you is that you would find peace in God's timing for your prophetic journey. May you grow in both favor with God and with people, allowing the Lord to develop in you the character needed to carry His voice with integrity. Let me be clear- the path to your prophetic purpose isn't just about reaching a destination – it's about becoming the person who can faithfully steward the authority that comes with it.

4 Lessons After 50 Years of Marriage

By Kris Vallotton • February 12, 2025

Kathy and I are celebrating our 50th anniversary this year, and we’ve been together for 54. We’ve experienced highs and lows together and built a life I never imagined possible! Over the past 50+ years, we’ve learned a few things that I want to share with you to help your marriage thrive! Know when to sacrifice pleasure for the pursuit of joy. Kathy and I have learned when to sacrifice pleasure for the pursuit of joy; this is the discipline of laying down your life for another. A practical example of this is when people find out we have horses. They say, “Oh wow, Kris, you have horses!” My response to them goes something like this, “No, I don’t have horses. Kathy has horses. I only pay for the horses.” Their next question for me usually is, “Don’t you like horses?” To which I respond, “No, I don’t like horses, but I like Kathy.” You see, I get a lot of joy out of doing what Kathy wants to do. I am willing to sacrifice my own pleasure to pursue what develops joy in our marriage. It’s not one-sided, Kathy does the same for me. 2. Forgiveness restores the standard. If you’ve been in a relationship for any length of time, then you know the honeymoon phase doesn't last forever. The person that you love and cherish at the deepest level is the same person that will stretch, challenge, and offend you. I learned this lesson years ago when my kids were teenagers. I became angry with Kathy in front of them and treated her disrespectfully. An hour later, I apologized, and she forgave me. Colossians 3:13 tells us that “Bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive". The truth is, forgiveness restores the standard of holiness in us and through us. 3. It’s not bad if your spouse thinks differently than you. Men and women think differently, and this is metaphorically demonstrated in the way they were created. Please understand what I am trying to communicate here. I am not at all trying to dishonor either gender. I know that women and men are equally intelligent. When Kathy and I got married, I didn’t understand marriage or women at all. I was so ignorant that it wasn’t even funny. I just had no value for Kathy’s opinion, while we were making decisions, when she refused to produce the facts for her conclusions. She often prefaced her statements with phrases like, “I feel like...,” “It troubles me that...,” “I don’t feel good about that...,” and so on. But what I learned over time, as many of my great decisions began to turn into mistakes, was that her “It feels like” or “This troubles me” were often a lot more accurate than the so-called facts! As the years have rolled on, I have learned to invite the rest of me, and my other half, my wife, into all of my decisions. And she has learned the same thing. We were made to be together. We are one flesh, a mystery that continues to unfold with time. 4. Vision gives pain a purpose. It is my conviction that we are living in a generation perishing for lack of vision. This is evident in many different areas of life, but I also see it in marriages. Having a vision for your marriage will help you persevere through the harder seasons that you’ll face together. Many years ago I had a vision where I was standing next to this elderly gentleman and could see him perfectly, but the man could not see me. The older man was surrounded by children and grandchildren telling stories about the family's history, lineage, and favor with God. In the vision he said, “And all of this began with your great-great-grandmother and great-great-grandfather.” I looked up and above the mantle of the fireplace and there was a huge portrait of Kathy and me! The Lord spoke to me and said: “You are no longer to live for a ministry—you are to live to leave a legacy! Your children’s children’s children are depending on you leaving them a world in revival. From this day forward, you will live for a generation that you will never see. You are to have a one-hundred-year vision so that you can build from the future.” This vision of our future helped us in developing a strategy to apprehend God’s goals for our lives, and it was the fuel that kept us going in the harder seasons. Consequently, from that day on, we began to build from the future, as the Lord had said. Let me be clear: you don't have to have a literal vision like I did, but you should have a vision and a direction for the future! Your marriage isn’t just about you, it’s about the generations that will follow. The truth is, the way you love, lead, and fight for your marriage today is building a legacy for your children and their children. So take time with your spouse, dream with God, and dream with each other. Get a vision for your family’s future! The breakthrough you experience now will impact the generations to come.

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