Kris Vallotton • Apr 07, 2018

How to Cut Out the Jealousy That’s Stealing Your Favor

Here’s the deal: jealousy is something that every human being has to work through in life. You may not consider yourself the “jealous type” but let me ask you this: have you ever seen someone else get promoted and immediately thought “well why should they be?”… perhaps you’ve even begun to list off all the reasons why that person should not be given favor. This kind of jealousy, although it may not be what we all immediately think of when we hear that word, is rooted in a poverty mindset, fueled by insecurity, and often anointed by suspicion.


Ouch, right!? The truth is that God has placed special favor on certain individuals in the world. It’s easy to get jealous when we see others getting special treatment, having giftings we want, or given a special place of leadership. Jealousy may come up in your heart when you face the reality that people will be exalted above you in different seasons, so today I’d love to share some healthy ways to deal with it:


Video Notes:


  • 2 Corinthians 5:16 says, “Therefore from now on we recognize no one according to the flesh; even though we have known Christ according to the flesh, yet now we know Him in this way no longer.”
  • Discerning of spirits helps us to know each other by the spirit, instead of by the flesh.
  • The discerning of spirits isn’t just to discern evil spirits, but it also discerns the favor on somebody’s life so that you can behave properly towards them.
  • In Luke 14, Jesus gave this illustration of being invited to sit at a table. He says in verse 10: “But when you are invited, go and recline at the last place, so that when the one who has invited you comes, he may say to you, ‘Friend, move up higher’; then you will have honor in the sight of all who are at the table with you.”
  • One of the things it means to be spiritual is (by the gift of discernment) to discern what level of favor is on someone, so you can behave properly towards them.
  • If someone has more favor than you, then the best thing to do is it get low and receive.
  • The gift of discernment can keep you out of jealousy, because it helps you realize that what’s on that person’s life is from God, and you don’t want to mess with what’s form God
  • Discernment anointed by jealousy is suspicion.
  • When you have an opinion about someone that’s negative, then your discernment sucks. Don’t trust it. I know this from experience…Every time I have an issue with someone, my discernment is anointed by the wrong spirit and it becomes suspicion. So, instead of being used for God, it’s being used by the enemy.
  • There are healthy and unhealthy ways to deal with jealousy.
  • An unhealthy way to deal with jealousy is to make sure that nobody does anything you’re jealous of. This is called communism. It’s changing the structure to deal with the heart problem. Whenever someone becomes great, we change the structure so that nobody can become great.
  • Have you ever noticed that Jesus always took the same three people with Him to special places—Peter, James and John. Jesus wasn’t fair. He didn’t apologize for having a special relationship or favoring three, even though He hung out with 12 people.
  • The side effect of creating a culture like this is that people get jealous and envious.
  • There’s no one like you, so when you’re jealous of someone you’ve forgotten that you’re the best you that you can be.
  • Jealousy says that there’s not enough favor to go around, so if someone else gets exalted that means they were favored at my expense. It says that because someone else got favored, I won’t.
  • But Jesus says that if someone else is favored it’s an opportunity to get favor too. How? By serving the people who have the favor and humbling yourself. This is the pathway to being exalted (James 4:10).



FREEDOM IN DISCERNMENT


Most people think of discernment as seeing what kinds of evil spirits are hanging around a person. Maybe you can read people like a book, but somehow you’re only picking up on the bad? This is a twisted version of discernment and if this is how you usually operate in your gift, I have good news for you today! When you allow your gift to be anointed by Holy Spirit instead of by jealousy, you’ll start discerning the favor on the lives of the people around you!


Today I want to encourage you to look for the favor on others, get low, and receive from the way God is moving on the people around you! If there’s a particular person in your life that you’re jealous of, ask God to help you to discern the favor on them, and begin thanking Him for the gifts that they carry. Want to take it a step further? Choose to encourage that person today in the gifts you see over them!


Have you ever had to work through this in your own heart? Or are you dealing with jealousy now? I’d love to hear about your process in the comments below!


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